Jan 03

Haiku 1061

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , , , January 3rd, 2013

by Kelly

by Kelly

we watch Han Min’s heart

beat on the screen — it’s as if

we made him ourselves

Today, Hubby and I took Han Min to a geneticist. Because he is adopted, his family history is unknown, and he has some known health issues, we wanted to speak with a specialist to see if there were any tests we could pursue that could help us (and him) be aware of any future health concerns.

We decided not to go ahead with any genetic testing right now. His DNA, after all, isn’t going anywhere. We could always decide, or he could decide when he gets older, to go ahead with a blood draw. But for now, he will remain our little mystery.

Yet two things did happen at the doctor’s office. After meeting and getting to know Han Min, the geneticist told us she thought he was beautiful.

“Well, thank you,” I said. “But you know, we didn’t have anything to do with that.”

“You certainly did,” she said. “You picked him.”

Hubby and I jumped on that comment at the same time. “No, we didn’t,” we both said. “They just called us and there he was.”

“But you said yes,” the doctor said.

That is true. We did say yes. But it has never felt as though Han Min’s presence in our lives is the result of us “picking” him. Instead, it really does feel as though he landed in our laps by some miracle that neither one of us can explain — which is absurd seeing as how we spent months filling out forms, forms and more forms to be approved for the adoption process.

And while it’s somewhat comforting to compare Han Min’s personality traits to traits that Hubby and I share, we don’t kid ourselves that we had anything to do with Han Min’s inherent adorableness, athleticism or intelligence — three traits anyone who spends more than three minutes with the kid recognizes immediately.

And yet. During the doctor’s exam, she noticed a heart murmur. Normally, a heart murmur wouldn’t be something to be overly concerned about, but she was the first doctor to hear it — and poor Han Min has seen way more than his fair share of doctors in his short seven months with us. A second doctor in the room confirmed the murmur.

Because of some of Han Min’s underlying health issues, Hubby and I were worried. Was this a new development in his health? Was this murmur just the start of something that was going to turn into a bigger deal?

And so, a hour later, we found ourselves in a darkened room with our little Han Min stripped from the waist up lying on a table having an echo cardiogram.

“The doctor is going to take a picture of your heart,” we told him.

Assured there would be no “ouchies,” and with his mommy and daddy by his side, Han Min bravely laid back and let the “picture taking” begin.

The screen on the large machine lit up and the image that appeared was just like an ultra sound of a fetus. It was black and white and in that same tell tale wedge shape that I’ve tried so many times to ignore as yet one more friend posted their own image on Facebook as an announcement to the world.

But here was our ultra sound of our little Han Min. And his heart was beating. And we could see it. And we could hear it. And for a moment, it was like he really was of our own making.

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Sep 06

Haiku 1052

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , , , , September 6th, 2012

by Kelly

by Kelly

leaves crunch underfoot

Han Min starts preschool and I

return to haiku

It’s been four months since I last posted a haiku. It feels like an eternity. So much happened during those summer months that I don’t even know how to begin describing them. In short — I became a mom. My husband and I adopted a little boy (2 and a half) from China.

I had high hopes that I would haiku throughout this major life transition. Alas, my plans fell short. In the beginning, I couldn’t have found the time (or the energy) to compose a haiku and post it even if I tried. And then, well, once I started to have the energy — and even composed a few haiku in my mind — between the laundry and the grocery shopping, I just couldn’t figure out how to make it to the computer and log into the site to post anything.

And now it is fall and my little guy is off to preschool. His academic career is starting slow; he’ll attend just two days a week. But I’m so excited to have some time to myself to organize the office and post haiku!

So here’s hoping this is the first of many “motherhood” haiku from my point-of-view.

Comments (1)

Apr 30

Haiku 1046

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , , April 30th, 2012

The Road to Han Min: 3

by Kelly

by Kelly

I pray for patience

empathy, courage, health, love —

we’ll come home parents

Comments (2)

Apr 26

Haiku 1044

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , , April 26th, 2012

The Road to Han Min: 2

by Kelly

by Kelly

he will have to wait

a year to see these flowers —

this thought brings sadness

Comments (3)

Apr 19

Haiku 1043

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , , , April 19th, 2012

The Road to Han Min: 1

by Kelly

by Kelly

Three trips to Target.

Where is reassurance stocked?

Motherhood is near.

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Apr 04

Haiku 1037

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , , , April 4th, 2012

by Kelly

by Kelly

How many haiku

have I composed while in bed

and lost by morning?

I’ve been a bad, bad haiku blogger in the past month. After February and my one-haiku-each-day pledge, it must seem to any Haiku By Two readers that my haiku muscle siezed up. But that’s not necessarily true. I’ve composed many haiku in the days since NaHaiWriMo ended. It’s just that I never got around to posting them online, and now, I fear, those never-recorded poems are hopelessly lost. Yet some things have been changing in my life recently. My husband and I are preparing to become parents. This will be our first child. In preparation, I’ve left my job. March, it seemed, was one big rush to “tie up loose ends.” And now I’ve got some time on my hands. I guess one could say I’m currently living in the calm before the storm. I’m hoping haiku can help me through this waiting game.

 

 

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Mar 14

Haiku 1034

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , March 14th, 2012

by Kelly

by Kelly

the snow leaves behind

dried hydrangea puffs and a

playground for my boy

Comments (2)

Feb 03

Haiku 993: NaHaiWriMo 3 by Kelly

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , , , , , February 3rd, 2012

by Kelly

by Kelly

waiting for news of

his promotion and our son —

we shiver in bed

Comments (2)

Jan 30

Haiku 988

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , , , January 30th, 2012

by Kelly

by Kelly

Sunday morning snow

glitters like sun on diamonds —

We shop for Han Min.

Comments (1)

Nov 09

Haiku 975, take two

Posted: under Daily Haiku, Kelly's Haiku.
Tags: , , , , , , , , , November 9th, 2011

by Kelly

by Kelly

It hasn’t snowed yet,

but it will. Soon. — We wait for

news of Henry Han.

Late last night I created a haiku and scheduled it to post this morning. Of course, as soon I went to bed, my mind started playing that poem over and over in my mind and I came up with a better version. Or what I think is a better version.

But I did’t get into the system early enough today to change it before it went live. Usually, when this happens (this isn’t the first time I’ve thought of a better version of a haiku once I posted), I go into the system and fiddle with my words within the post. By doing this, though, readers probably won’t notice what sort of revisions I’ve made, or what sort of thought process I went through. So this time, instead of just making the changes, I decided to leave the original and then create a new post for the revision in order to reveal my writing process.

I like this second version of the haiku better than the first. The second falls more in line with the idea that a haiku have a break, a switch in perspective.

And I like that even though this haiku has a change in topics that both, really, are about waiting. In the beginning, the waiting is for snow, for a change of season. In the end, the waiting is for news of a child, for news that our adoption match has been accepted and approved by the Chinese government.

Hubby and I are hoping that the snow, when it comes, will bring with it that blessed paperwork for which we are waiting. After all, according to the paperwork we got about our little guy, “Han” means winter.

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